Graduation Season

 

 I've always been sort of dubious about the number of graduations there are these days: preschool, kindergarten, elementary school... it all seemed so contrived to me. Now that I am a parent actually experiencing it, I understand why they have them.

Joseph Campbell talks about the importance of ritual and public celebration. Birth, coming of age, marriage, death, are all celebrated by the community and the individual and community are stronger for it. I get it. But, I also am beginning to understand that some of the smaller milestones need recognition too. I saw that public celebration recently at my son's preschool graduation.

It was a simple affair. The kids had hats, sat at circle for the last time, sang three songs they have learned through the year (one about respecting themselves, one about how to say no, and one about how to call on an adult figure if situations could not be resolved... I approved), and were given diplomas, books, and small tokens. The whole thing took twenty minutes.

Toe and his friends had a great time. Parents, grandparents, and siblings were there to bear witness to the last day these friends would have together in this space. The kids are moving on to three different elementary schools in the region. And Toe has come so far. At the beginning of the school year, he was terrified to be in a situation without his mom or dad there. He was reassured during the first few days of school, but also clingy. Over the months, Toe came to feel that this was his space, these were his people, and he belonged. He would walk into the room like Norm in that old tv show Cheers, knowing that his place was assured. He built many skills - most importantly, the ability to play with friends his own age. And he made some great friends, ones whom we will continue to see outside of school.

This is completely thanks to Mrs. Raihala and Ms. Allen, the wonderful teachers at Grace Preschool. They create an atmosphere of calm and respect that allows these children to feel safe, loved, and ready to explore. Learning happens through play, and children are given ample time for self exploration, as well as instruction. The kids sang, did yoga, did imaginative play, built, painted, learned to clean up.... all in a relaxed and happy atmosphere. Parents only were able to volunteer once a month, so I was only able to attend a few days, but I loved what I saw, and I love the things that I hear at home even more. 

Next year, as it stands, he will be going to Kindergarten half days at the local elementary school. We will see if the school is able to meet Toe's needs and if he stays healthy. If it doesn't work, we would send him back to Grace Preschool in a heartbeat (the education he needs is more social than academic at this point). They took care of his CF needs willingly and helped Toe learn how to interact with other people. They have created a foundation for us - the first base beyond what his parents can teach him - that will be with him for the rest of his life.

If that's not worth celebrating, I'm not sure what is.